Jasmine

Jasmine was always my favorite disney princess because:

1) She didn't wear a dress.

2) She wasn't the damsel in distress that all the other princesses were. She didn't wait for her prince to save her. She kicked butt all on her own, or at least helped out with Aladdin's plans.

3) She was bad-ass.

4) She was a rebel. I vividly remember one scene (mind you, I haven't seen this movie in years) where she sneaks out over the palace walls, disobeying her daddy.

5) She had a pet tiger.

6) She had the best hair.

Given, she really only beat out Mulan by having a pet tiger and good hair, but Jasmine gets major props for everything else, too.

Y U NO MAKE UP YOUR MIND WEATHER???

Okay so the weather has decided to be very fickle and inconsiderate to us in Virginia. In January and through February, it was what some would call winter. There was no snow (well, thats not completely true. There was snow, but it stuck for about an hour), which was rather disappointing. So then it was still cold through March, but just after the vernal equinox (technical term for the middle of Spring), it got warmer. Of course this happened the day after I got a new jacket. And a sweater. And a long-sleeve shirt. And jeans. Because obviously the universe hates me.

So anyways, it was Spring for less than a week. And then it was summer. not full blown Summer, mind you, but it was pretty hot. So there we were: wearing shorts and t-shits to school, when all the sudden, IT'S WINTER AGAIN!!! WHAT?

It was winter again for about a week, and now, we are back to Spring. I'll keep you posted. Or not.

The BarrelEye fish

Barreleye
Macropinna microstoma

February 23, 2009—With a head like a fighter-plane cockpit, a Pacific barreleye fish shows off its highly sensitive, barrel-like eyes—topped by green, orblike lenses—in a picture released today but taken in 2004. The fish, discovered alive in the deep water off California’s central coast by the Monterey Bay Aquarium Research Institute (MBARI), is the first specimen of its kind to be found with its soft transparent dome intact. The 6-inch (15-centimeter) barreleye (Macropinna microstoma) had been known since 1939—but only from mangled specimens dragged to the surface by nets.

Photos © Monterey Bay Aquarium Research Institute

Orchids

Last year, my dad got my mom an orchid plant for their anniversary. We have not yet been able to kill it with our evil powers of the "brown thumb," the anti-green thumb.*

Orchids are always viewed as delicate things, maybe because they is often considered one of the more beautiful flowers. But man, this plant is hearty. Its flowers and their part of the stem died, but it has mayhaps three times the blooms this year. It is in a sunny room, but you can see it just growing up against the window to try to get more. It has weird, rooty things that grew up and around the outside of the pot.

You're supposed to put three ice cubes in the pot once a week so that it gets its water slowly as the ice melts. We end up watering it for two weeks in a row and then for get about it for a month and a half.

But no matter what we do, we can't seem to discourage its life-giving force.*

This speaks volumes to me, as someone who looks for metaphors in everything (or maybe I don't. I can't decide). This simple plant that has been unwillingly place high on a pedestal, with everyone rushing around to do even the simplest of tasks of photosynthesis for it, for no other reason than because it doesn't look like it could handle it. Or because its "pretty." Either way, this flower has unwittingly been turned into a martyr for all things misunderstood, underestimated, and/or female. Simple Orchid, I salute you for having the courage to be beautiful and bad-ass.

*Disclamer: we are not purposefully trying to kill the plant. That just seems to happen whenever I am living in the same household as an oxygen excreting organism.

The epic conclusion to the saga of the evil ghetto bus driver

Floyd Boyd told us that the day before winter break would be his last day and guess what! It was!!! We didn't believe him because he himself (or sometimes some random kid on the bus) has told us he was leaving at least once per year, but he finally left!!! We have a floater bus driver for now. At the beginning, her kids sat in the very front seat in car seats during the route, but they aren't there anymore. I'm guessing its because she decided our filthy mouths are too unclean for her children. Oh well.

Goodbye Floyd Boyd. May your life be forever happy and full of cactuses to hump.

Ten and a half reasons why I am an honorary Asian.

1. I read manga. (narutooooo!!!!)

2. I am a nerd. And IB. And smart. And a nerd.

3.I have an Asian cousin in Hong-Kong (she is also IB!!!!)

4. A large percentage of my friends are of Asian or part Asian blood.

5. I just percentigized my friends.

6. ME GUSTA.

7. I had Jhondis when I was born (which means my skin was yellowish. I was yellow. It counts.)

8. I know how to use chopsticks and can use them efficiently.

9. I have been mistaken for Asian before.

10. I know how to say more than ni-how. Or however you would phonetically spell that.

10.5. I have done origami before. It is very frustrating, especially when the instructions are on the back of the sheet of paper you're trying to origamitize.

The Best Chat and why my Crocodile No Longer has Tea with the Queen.

A chat with pate, my invisible twin.

me: hay ivisibibble twin

*invisibibble

Pate: invisibble twin it says your offline!

you truly are invisible

stares in awe

gasp

me: bows to crowd and pulls rabbit out of hat

Taa-daa!

Pate: gasp

BRAVO!!!!!!!!!!

me: we are so cool.

lol

Pate: now pull a donkey out of the hat rachel!

haha

yup ikr/

?

me: donkey is to big. what you pull out of the hat is directly proportional to the size of the hat.

Pate: heres an idea buy a donkeysized hat

me: also sometimes the shape matters too.

Pate: hmm...........what if the animal is tall and skinny?

could you have a short hat to pull it out of?

me: and i cant buy a donkey hat becasue i dont know wherer to get one and if i went to get one i would have to stop chatting.

and yes, it just has to fit out of the opening.

Pate: true........You get them at the donkey hat store

they sell hats to donkeys

its the new thing

you didnt know?

buying hats for donkeys

me: i geuss im just out of it.

Pate: i know do you live under a rock?????????

its ok so do i

me: no ur confusing me with biz. i live in a human-sized hat.

Pate: wait i thought you lived in a shoe?

me: no thats a little old lady with a bunch of kids. what ever gave you that idea?

Pate: i dont kno

you just seem like the kind of person that would live in a shoe

me: nope. its a hat. but if i did live in a shoe, it would be my converse.

Pate: really? see i would live in an UG

UGG

me: wow. why?

Pate: cuz its cozy and big. of course if i had to live in something id live in a mall

playing hide and seek in it every day

short pump mall

me: niiiice.

Pate: what about you?

what would u live in if anything?

me: and an ugg would be awfley uncomforable in the summer.

Pate: thats true

oh hot

but its shady

me: haha okay. if i could live in anything...a tree. or a tree house that grew right out of the tree house. or sometghing like that.

Pate: woah a tree house that was as big as a city!

me: not that big. i dont need that much space.

Pate: maybe you do

i mean with all these hats and animals

you might

me: hmm thats true...i didnt think of that.

Pate: plus i dont think that youll want to live within 5 miles of your pet crocidile

me: no, my crocodile lives in a swamp in a pair of crocs.

and it likes me and i pet it and play with it with rather frayed chew toys.

Pate: where does it do its business?

me: on a toilet. duh. where else?

lol

say that again? i didnt get it.

Pate: say what?

me: it said "pate has entered text"... what did you enter?

Pate: nothing brb

me: okay

Pate: back how did you train your crocidile

me: what do you mean train? hes not trained. But we do have lovely 2 o'clock teas every sunday and thursday...

Pate: oh he's very soffisticated

me: yes, from london.

Pate: really? he has tea with the queen?

me: no that was only once. they brought out a platter of fish fingers and custard (his favorite food) and he got so excited that he jumped up on the table and stuck his face right in the food. he was never invited back. it was very embaressing for him.

Pate: aww

did the queen cry?

me: yeah. he sent an apology letter, but they never responded.

she didnt cry. she said harumph!

Pate: mabye they were still shocked

i gtg sorry bye

me: bye!